The Blind Date From Hell (pt1)

The Blind Date From Hell (pt1)

It was the summer of '91 and the first time in my life since I'd began dating that I found myself alone. I just came off an engagement break-up and had met a girl at college who went home for the summer. She would eventually become my first wife seven years later but all I could see at that time was a bleak summer where most my friends and prospective dates had deserted town for the familiarity of home.

The blind date from hell entered my life through a wrong number. My roommate at the time, Matt, answered the phone one night and began talking to this chick. He was in a relationship so to him, it was a novelty to talk to a complete stranger with no expectations or responsibility. They'd never meet, so what harm was it?

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The Picky Eater

The Picky Eater

For 37 years now, I have been an extremely picky eater. I can't help it, it's just who I am. I won't eat certain foods for the stupidest reasons. What reasons? You wouldn't believe me if I told you.

Of course, I'll try. And maybe some of you out there will learn that you're not alone.

1. Green Things: Early in life I developed an aversion to all foods green. Doctor Moore, my childhood doctor, used to lecture to me that I was building a body based on the foods I ate. This didn't help. Who wants a body of spinach and green beans?

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The Jew and the Bacon

The Jew and the Bacon

I have two bosses, a 49-yr old Korean woman and an 86-yr old Jewish man. The woman is the caring, motherly type that treats me like another son. The old man is a codgy bugger who built a couple million-dollar companies up from scratch and now plays around in the property management field.

The old man personifies the Jewish stereotype. He has the typical long face and deep-set eyes. He speaks Yiddish. And he's so tight with his money that he makes my dad look like Donald Trump in his spending habits. (Read about my dad here)

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That Time of the Year

That Time of the Year

It's here, it's finally here! I never thought it would come but now it has. Dove Season officially opened in North Carolina on Labor Day!!

Yep, you heard me. It's now legal to go out and shoot those pesky doves that are always eating up the garden. The good thing is, you can bag up to five of those little buggers every day.

Seriously folks, I didn't know dove hunting still existed. Do people eat doves? I don't know about you, but as far as birds go, I can't imagine doves being very tasty or very meaty. Once you pull all the buckshot out of one, what do you have left? Four ounces of actual meat?

How do you cook it? Is there a dove cookbook? I can imagine the recipies: Dove Stew. Dove a l'Orange. Dove with Mac & Cheese.

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I Follow The Moose Tracks

I Follow The Moose Tracks

Moose Tracks is one of the most popular ice cream flavors around. Created by Denali Flavors , it first came on the market in the mid-90s and has steadily swept the nation. I first remember trying it with Wife #1 in a little ice cream parlor on the waterfront in Savannah, Georgia. Yum.

Moose Tracks, for those of you living in a hole, is creamy vanilla ice cream stuffed with rich chocolate fudge and creamy chocolate peanut butter cups. But I've got to say one thing, it's not the best name for an ice cream.

What's the first thing you think of when you hear the name Moose Tracks? Yep, me too. Moose poop.

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